Season Three is upon us, CineDump, and with it comes more of the uncannily uncouth, the vitriolically violent, and the disturbingly dreamlike.
Theme:
Awesome Show continues its satirical takedown of capitalism, using Season Three, Episode One “Resurrection,” to exuberantly mock commercials and infomercials. The main saga of Tim’s return from death is devoid of all mystery or spiritual significance--instead, it is reduced to the amount of “hundos” Tim and Eric can earn through their production of Tiny Tigers. Then, there are the two segments featuring the “Dick Dousche Penile Cleanser,” a product, much like many products targeted at women, that prays on insecurity. Finally, and most sublimely, infomercial queen Cathy Mitchell plays herself in a segment with Dr. Steven Brule, the “Griddleman.” Taken together, these three sketches portray a tacky vacuousness, a joyous descent to the bottom of commercialism.
Hi-Lights:
Host Segment (Part 2)
After Tim’s tedious resurrection, Tim and Eric are seen dressed as cowboys, practicing their high-pitched yips like professionals. Tim shows Eric his power of generating Tiny Tigers from thin air. Quickly doing the math, they realize that they can earn up to “one hundo” a day which would make them rich. After chanting “boomba,” they exit the stage slowly, laboriously, as though they are riding horses.
We Sell Tiny Tigers
If a meteor is headed for earth and we have to put together a time capsule of all of humanity’s best achievements, I’m nominating a little space for “We Sell Tiny Tigers,” the commercial Tim and Eric create. The aesthetics are perfectly cracked, with overlapping images, fuzzy green screen, the repeated chants of “We sell tiny tigers”--perfection. Then, to amp things up, both Tim and Eric embark on crazed tiger impressions. At the end of the sketch, Tim stares earnestly into the camera and promises, “My tigers are perched on a log.” Well, buddy, sign me up.
Host Segment (Part 3)
Season Three Episode One ends strong: set to the propulsive rhythm of an 80’s power ballad, we see the palatial “Tiny Tigers” store, which looks like the worst sex shop in history. As Eric demands more and more tigers, Tim strips and eventually becomes a desiccated husk of his former manly glory. Despite Eric’s rage at his tiger-crazed customers and his heartfelt apology, Tim once again perishes.
Anatomy of an Episode:
Host Segment (Part 1)
A leather-clad Eric mourns at Tim’s graveside.
Great Job Interlude
An intense older man on a flying carpet repeats “great job” as he is lifted into a clip art sky.
Dick Dousche
I bet you think you know what the Dick Dousche Penile Cleansing System is all about, but did you know it’s great for cleaning tuffits, scrims, and faahs?
Host Segment (Part 2)
See Hi-Lights. Our boys devise a scheme to earn over one hundo a day.
Griddleman
Cathy Mitchell, the queen of my childhood, the empress of infomercials, the face that launched a thousand griddle-based kitchen appliances, is absolute perfection next to Dr. Brule, her co-host. The best part is her sincere commitment to selling a tub of horse grease along with her panini griddle. That’s professionalism.
Afternoon Review: The Daytime Show for Women
A fear-inducing melange of synth drones, percussion, chantings, clowns, and one many suffering full-body spasms. Daytime programming from hell.
We Sell Tiny Tigers
See Hi-Lights. A master class in the intentionally bad commercial.
Dick Dousche Interlude
The CEO of the Dick Dousche Penile Cleansing System flubs his lines, earning him a freeze-frame and “Great job!”
Host Segment (Part 3)
See Hi-Lights. Eric still hasn’t learned a damn thing about how to appreciate his friend, and once again, Tim pays the price.
Winner:
For the second time since embarking on this journey, I am tempted to give the prize to both Tim and Eric for their virtuosic turn in “We Sell Tiny Tigers.” I’m giving this one to Tim. For a superior tiger impression and his ability to fabricate tigers out of thin air, Tim Heidecker, I hereby proclaim you, CineDump’s Tiger King.
Pennie Sublime